Hampshire Fire and Rescue Service Past Members Association

We Are Not Amused

This page is dedicated to those little quips, jokes, images and video clips that we find amusing and love to share. So that we don't inadvertently infringe anyone's copyright accessing the images and clips is achieved by linking you directly with the source website.

Cyril has recently provided us with some excellent links that are shown below. If you have any that you feel warrant being published then let us know by sending them to webmaster@xhfrs.org.uk and we'll consider our legal position before adding them to the list. Thanks Cyril.....Now you're famous!

Featured Video Clips:

Clip No 1: The Red Sparrows

Basingstoke perform their 1984 spectacular display again courtesy of Youtube. Thanks to Pip Warwick for advising us of its presence. Click here (speaker on!) to view

Clip No 2: Stand By Me

This video clip, provided to us by Cyril, just goes to prove that the everyday people have real talent. Click here (speakers on!!) to watch it.

Clip No 3: Do Re Mi

Filmed in the Central (Train) Station, Antwerp in Belgium at 8:00a.m. on March 23 2009 with no warning to the passengers passing through the station. From nowhere a recording of Julie Andrews singing 'Do, Re, Mi' begins to play on the public address system. Click here (speakers on!!) to watch the clip as the bemused passengers watch in amazement, some 200 dancers begin to appear from the crowd and station entrances . Reportedly, they created this amazing stunt with just two rehearsals! Enjoy. Many thanks to Cyril for bringing this one to our screens.

Clip No 4: Granny Strikes Back

While two children play blissfully on their skate boards they witness the abuse of a helpless little old lady.......but perhaps she's not as helpless as she looks! Turn on you system speakers and click here to watch the clip.

Clip No 5: Kids and Railway Tracks

Please don't let your kids play near the railway tracks, it can be very dangerous and this clip proves it! Turn on you system speakers and click here to watch the clip.

Clip No 6: All In the Line of Duty

When you're a public servant it's best to remember that you need to stay calm and respectful no matter what happens. Turn on you system speakers and click here to watch the clip.

**We don't have space to show more than 6 clips on the website click here but click here to view our Video Clip Archive**

Amusing Pictures:

Hooray!! Cyril Andrews is the first to provide us with links to some amusing photo's that we can actually use, click here to see what he's come up with. Many thanks Cyril.

ResusAnnie is not going to recover from this...........click here to view thanks to Cyril

Teasers:

We all see things differently:

We perhaps all see things differently to one another, click here to see what I mean. Thanks to Cyril for the contribution.

Try and read the following:

Olny srmat poelpe can raed tihs. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

How good are your eyes? Count how many F's you see in the following text:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS...

Click here to see the answer

Do you enjoy card tricks?

If you enjoy card tricks you'll certainly be captivated by this one, just click here to open it up in an new window

Some Tall Stories:

The following have all appeared in the British press (allegedly):

	Commenting on a complaint from a Mr. Arthur Purdey about a large gas bill, a spokesman for British Gas said, 'We agree it was rather high for the time of year. It's possible Mr. Purdey has been charged for the gas used up during the explosion that destroyed his house.' (The Daily Telegraph)
	Irish police are being handicapped in a search for a stolen van, because they cannot issue a description. It's a Special Branch vehicle and they don't want the public to know what it looks like. (The Guardian)
	A young girl who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teeth was rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coast guard spokesman commented, 'This sort of thing is all too common'. (The Times)
	At the height of the gale, the harbourmaster radioed a coast guard and asked him to estimate the wind speed. He replied he was sorry, but he didn't have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had just blown his Land Rover off the cliff. ( Aberdeen Evening Express)
	Mrs. Irene Graham of Thorpe Avenue , Boscombe, delighted the audience with her reminiscence of the German prisoner of war who was sent each week to do her garden. He was repatriated at the end of 1945, she recalled - 'He'd always seemed a nice friendly chap, but when the crocuses came up in the middle of our lawn in February 1946, they spelt out 'Heil Hitler.'' ( Bournemouth Evening Echo)

The following are all explanations given as part of their insurance claims:

	"On approach to the traffic lights the car in front suddenly broke."
	"I didn't think the speed limit applied after midnight"
	"I knew the dog was possessive about the car but I would not have asked her to drive it if I had thought there was any risk."
	"I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment."
	"The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention."
	"I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way"
	"A truck backed through my windscreen into my wife's face"
	"A pedestrian hit me and went under my car"
	"In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole."
	"I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car."
	"An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished."
	"I was thrown from the car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows."
	"Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have."
	"I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my head through it."

Answer to brain teaser:

There are 6 occurrences of the letter F in the sentence, if you only got 3 then don't worry you're not alone, it's because the brain fails to recognise the word 'of'.

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Copyright © 2009 HFRS Past Members Association Last modified: 10/10/11

Copyright © 2009 HFRS Past Members Association
Last modified: 10/10/11